How to deal with the loneliness
Updated: Oct 14
Accept that loneliness is inevitable and part of the process. Be patient with yourself as you experience a myriad of emotions during this time. Maybe you are feeling anger, or sadness. Maybe you are still in shock and still can’t wrap your head around what happened. Maybe you are frightened and wondering what you are supposed to do now? Observe the feelings, experience them but don’t live in them. Let them come for a while and let them go.
Be patient during this time and know that these feelings are normal and won't last forever.
Don’t isolate yourself. Sometimes it’s tempting to stay under the covers and close all the window shades. But it is important to create a balance between taking some time to allow yourself to feel the anger, sadness, resentfulness, etc. and do something that nurtures you. Such as spending time with good friends, going to the gym or meditating.
Take this time to start getting to know yourself again. What kinds of things do you lik?
What are some hobbies you love? What was something that you always wanted to learn?
Do you like hiking? Are secretly a poet? Do you enjoy knitting or gardening?
Do you like DYI projects or decorating? Do you like to cook?
Have you always wanted to learn to play the guitar or piano?
Make a list of all of these. Whatever comes to mind. Write it all out.
*Now look at your list and close your eyes.
Pick one of the things on your list and visualize yourself doing it.
Really picture the amazing time you will have doing it. Visualize every detail.
What are you wearing?
Are you home or did you go out somewhere?
What kinds of things are you using? (are you playing the guitar or writing in a beautiful journal?)
Really picture the quality time you are spending with yourself and see the smile it puts on your face. Enjoy this for a few minutes.
*Now grab a calendar & set a day and some time aside for making this happen. Really commit to it!
*Get out there and meet new people. Join a group if you are not sure how to go about this. There are likely many on-line groups in your area that share your interests. Or better yet, take a small risk and try something new! This is the time to do so. And when you do, make sure to congratulate yourself! Be your own best cheerleader! This will keep you motivated and excited to try something else.
So yes, everything has changed. You are in a whole new world. And maybe you are not used to doing things by yourself, but you will learn. When we are in this position, we tend to catastrophic the situation. How can we not? This is how it feels when we are in it, but the reality is that this is only one event in your life. If you can learn to use this time to get in touch with yourself. I mean to really get in tune with your best, highest and healthiest self, then you will be able to not only rebuild your life in the most amazing and authentic way, but you will learn how to navigate life’s challenges that your way. And that is truly priceless!